...I keep a Moët et Chandon in a pretty cabinet....12 grapes and a brand new set of Armani red underwear for when the clock hits midnight....you do the same or whatever it is that you do, but raise your glass at midnight, I will have mine up high.
Sorry about the music, but today merits a playlist, I hope you like.
2008 has been a good year for me, I'm an extremely lucky man and I can't complain about a thing. This month was my 7th year anniversary at work, made new friends, kept writing and was able to stay tobacco free. I also visited my Mom in Mexico and paid off my Chase card (bastards). But overall I learned that at 34 I can no longer live or get by on Hungry Man, which has brought a change on my eating habits and my focus on deeper spirituality growth will reach an apex since next month I'll be enrolled on Pole Dancing lessons (at last, so many people's dream come true). Yes, here at Bull fo Brougham we listen to your feedback dear readers, we might even begin a HFNT (half fat nekid Tuesday)... kidding
It was an amazing year: we were witnesses at how to offend the whole female population of a country simultaneously (Sarah Palin), we resurrected an old war hero from the dead (John McCain), we finally put O.J. Simpson in jail, we unearthed Cheney's blatant corruption and favoritism, got Bush to declare himself openly unaccountable, witnessed Zardari substitute Musharraf and David substitute
Fidel, if Che Guevara was alive he would have a show in Vegas or participating in the Celebrity Survivor Compton. We found millions of empty plastic coffins, had Marines and contractors tie a bunch of men by their wee weees and then had them fum ball in front of the cameras, yes, in Abu Graibh. We finally legalized water boarding and saw Santa's North Pole home be foreclosed. We also kissed good bye hundreds of thousands of jobs and Billions of dollars, we ignored Alberto Gonzalez' lies and amnesia and Maury is still on tv, thank you. We also saw the three largest American Car Manufacturers claiming bankruptcy as well as some 21 banks. So other than a couple of Shopping Mall shootings and an Alaskan Senator charged with corruption it went pretty uneventful. We uncovered the corruption this government has done in conjunction with companies like Blackwater and Halliburton. Oh and we elected Obama and that was so Historical that we will be remembered as the people who believed in change, for good or for ill.
My predictions for 2008:
Stock on canned soup, bottled water, batteries, flashlights, radios and medicines... in case things get as worse as they seem to be heading towards.
Damn it Wiwille and Miss A... here's mine:
What did you do in 2008 that you'd never done before?
I wore a condom (kidding, I've done this once before)
Did you keep your New Years' resolutions and will you make more for next year?
I did, I quit smoking
I will hit the gym, start working on my degree and I'm also writing a book for which I expect to be chased by a mob of villagers with torches and shit.
The title? you really want to know the title? fine
"Bitchslap"
Did anyone close to you give birth?
No births, just abortions...
Did anyone close to you die?
Yes, remembering Julian Boldo
What countries did you visit?
Mexico
What would you like to have in 2009 that you lacked in 2008?
Better health
What date from 2008 will remain etched upon your memory, and why?
Seeing Jorge and Marco Velez, cause they are my adoptive brothers and I hadn't seen them in decades
What was your biggest achievement of the year?
Giving people information and seeing them vote decidedly.
What was your biggest failure?
Hmmm, not withdrawing my 401k in time
Did you suffer illness or injury?
Yup, ended up at the E.R. and at the cardiologist a couple of times
What was the best thing you bought?
A night at a hotel
Whose behavior merited celebration?
Dennis, he has overcome one hell of a year.
Whose behavior made you appalled and depressed?
No Comments
Where did most of your money go?
Other people
What did you get really, really, really excited about?
A pair of black cheek... : |
Compared to this time last year, are you: Happier or sadder? Thinner or fatter? Richer or poorer?
I am miserable, obese and insanely wealthy, and I never lie.
What do you wish you'd done more of?
I didn't dance nearly enough Watusi as I wanted to.
What do you wish you'd done less of?
I wish I had dealt with less Tangos (drama)
Did you meet/date anyone special in 2008?
Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes and... oh yes.
...and yes.
How many one-night stands?
One, right? that's why it's called ONE NIGHT?
What was your favorite TV program?
Countdown with Olbermann
Do you hate anyone now that you didn't hate this time last year?
Not anymore, I've taken that power back
What was the best book you read?
Sadly enough I didn't read a single book this year.
What was your greatest musical discovery?
Hercules and Love Affair.
What was your favorite film of this year?
2 dogs and a bowl of eukanuba
What was your favorite birthday present?
“Lono - thanks Lauren”
What one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying?
Being a gentleman is fucked up sometimes I tell you... again, no comments
What kept you sane?
Lorazepam
Who was the best new person you met?
Kenya
Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2008.
Soy, not milk
12/30/08
12/29/08
Firefly
Again I'm sticking my hand in the cookie jar
acrobat on the kitchen's stool
balancing between life and death
suspended in the air
now glued to the sticky linoleum floor
It feels like hunger
but it's just angst
It seems like insomnia
but it's just my mind
and my empty hands reach out
to nothing but air
nothing but the ghost of you
on my tight chest
that you don't kiss
or bite
It's not the winter
the reason for my chapped lips
and you've never heard that song
you wouldn't understand
I'm just a little boy
dazed and confused
in the carousel of names
and eyes and hands and people
in the mannequin treadmill
watching life depart
infomercial after infomercial
empty
like a bag of peanuts
on any commercial flight
like an empty raft
in the middle of the pacific ocean
only the fireflies glow
after this love
there's nothing left of me.
acrobat on the kitchen's stool
balancing between life and death
suspended in the air
now glued to the sticky linoleum floor
It feels like hunger
but it's just angst
It seems like insomnia
but it's just my mind
and my empty hands reach out
to nothing but air
nothing but the ghost of you
on my tight chest
that you don't kiss
or bite
It's not the winter
the reason for my chapped lips
and you've never heard that song
you wouldn't understand
I'm just a little boy
dazed and confused
in the carousel of names
and eyes and hands and people
in the mannequin treadmill
watching life depart
infomercial after infomercial
empty
like a bag of peanuts
on any commercial flight
like an empty raft
in the middle of the pacific ocean
only the fireflies glow
after this love
there's nothing left of me.
12/24/08
Jesus
We don't seem to do much for one another these days, much less go up on a cross and die for someone else's mistakes and never to seek forgiveness for them. We don't seem to write books about anyone spiritually real, instead celebrity and fame are achieved through botched elections, corruption, wealth, bad music, or the capability of throwing a ball in a hoop.
We don't seem to walk a path of love, instead we stray in the highway of lust, decadence, ignorance and selfishness.
Will we be judged? why not? we keep judging one another all the time, some stalking, some complaining, some making a myspace soap opera and some just downright being idiotic narrowminded racist, xenophobic, homophobic or classist pigs. Please, don't make me remember that I also lie, and think of sin and hate particularly those who hate our freedom and the path to Heaven through the love and forgiveness of the Lord Jesus Christ.
Some of us won't turn the other cheeck.
Some of us won't welcome you with bread and wine.
Some of us make crosses and crowns of thorns.
I think you've heard us, we're the ones who dropped the bombs.
God will forgive us, for defending our children
Jesus will guide us, and we can't silence His name.
Merry Christmas
Remember it is someone's birthday we celebrate today
His birthday
and Our birthday for being born again, born in the Lord, Jesus Christ
All the reasons I have to prove that Jesus isn't real, are crazy.
All the reasons I have to prove that Jesus is real, are even crazier.
For it isn't without fear that I love Jesus
and we will strike with all might
cause we will never be victims of your extremist creeds
cause we will no longer be terrorized
cause we will defend our land and our Bible and the Lord
Holy Virgin Mary
Keep us in your womb
Bless our troops, may they soon deliver
a fucking nuclear bomb
Amen.
(Yes I'm kinda chaotic catholic and christian confused, chase me with a wafer)
We don't seem to walk a path of love, instead we stray in the highway of lust, decadence, ignorance and selfishness.
Will we be judged? why not? we keep judging one another all the time, some stalking, some complaining, some making a myspace soap opera and some just downright being idiotic narrowminded racist, xenophobic, homophobic or classist pigs. Please, don't make me remember that I also lie, and think of sin and hate particularly those who hate our freedom and the path to Heaven through the love and forgiveness of the Lord Jesus Christ.
Some of us won't turn the other cheeck.
Some of us won't welcome you with bread and wine.
Some of us make crosses and crowns of thorns.
I think you've heard us, we're the ones who dropped the bombs.
God will forgive us, for defending our children
Jesus will guide us, and we can't silence His name.
Merry Christmas
Remember it is someone's birthday we celebrate today
His birthday
and Our birthday for being born again, born in the Lord, Jesus Christ
All the reasons I have to prove that Jesus isn't real, are crazy.
All the reasons I have to prove that Jesus is real, are even crazier.
For it isn't without fear that I love Jesus
and we will strike with all might
cause we will never be victims of your extremist creeds
cause we will no longer be terrorized
cause we will defend our land and our Bible and the Lord
Holy Virgin Mary
Keep us in your womb
Bless our troops, may they soon deliver
a fucking nuclear bomb
Amen.
(Yes I'm kinda chaotic catholic and christian confused, chase me with a wafer)
12/11/08
The Time Machine
Some people have a double life
a pseudonym
or nome de guerre
like a sword
two sides, both sharp
Some of use went down the rabbit's hole
to encounter ourselves in another movie
another book
or someone else's arms
behind the curtain call
or sitting at the end of the bar
maybe quietly at the coffee shop
or around the corner
living at night in the shadow play
Honestly, if you were invisible
wouldn't you do something you shouldn't?
if you could time travel
you would go anywhere but now
and if you knew they would never find you
would you dissappear?
think of the crystal ball
the nails on your back
hands that squeeze your wrists
time and time again
as you lay covered by a sunbeam of lips
would you?
drink that old bottle in the wine cellar
like an avid vampire
or bathe in the porcelain tub
and book a room in a fancy hotel
honestly
would you sin and live the dream?
escape from the cage
or lock yourself in?
some of us live a double life
and the one you see is half
just a half
of what we really are
but you won't do something you wouldn't
and that is why you are invisible
a few years from now
it won't really matter
or will it?
a pseudonym
or nome de guerre
like a sword
two sides, both sharp
Some of use went down the rabbit's hole
to encounter ourselves in another movie
another book
or someone else's arms
behind the curtain call
or sitting at the end of the bar
maybe quietly at the coffee shop
or around the corner
living at night in the shadow play
Honestly, if you were invisible
wouldn't you do something you shouldn't?
if you could time travel
you would go anywhere but now
and if you knew they would never find you
would you dissappear?
think of the crystal ball
the nails on your back
hands that squeeze your wrists
time and time again
as you lay covered by a sunbeam of lips
would you?
drink that old bottle in the wine cellar
like an avid vampire
or bathe in the porcelain tub
and book a room in a fancy hotel
honestly
would you sin and live the dream?
escape from the cage
or lock yourself in?
some of us live a double life
and the one you see is half
just a half
of what we really are
but you won't do something you wouldn't
and that is why you are invisible
a few years from now
it won't really matter
or will it?
12/5/08
Katia
Buenos Aires, Argentina - Circa 1987
Living in Brazil as a tourist required I leave the country every six and three months, not for very long, in about 48 hours I usually got my passport stamped and then I was welcome to enter the samba nation once more. This constant traveling allowed me to become more than familiar with Sao Paulo, Montevideo, Foz do Iguazu, Ciudad Stroessner and other South American cities. On this occasion my Mom and my step dad decided to join me at the Argentinian Capitol for a short vacation.
Buenos Aires is somber and very euro barroque, when compared to other cities of the Latin American cone it is glam and simply put is the classiest.
It's a beautiful and romantic town, the immense Rio de la Plata inlet and the old part of the City, particularly Barrio del Boca evokes Maradona, the Quilmes Soccer Squadra and the inevitable group of kids whistling tangos.
If you pay close attention you may spot Gardel's ghost, wandering around town on a Saturday night, hidden in an oxford grey cashmere coat. It was in this city of tangos, of romantic temper tantrums where I saw her for the first time: sitting on a couch at the lobby as I entered the hotel.
Blond like golden hay under the hard country sun on a hot summer day, green eyes like an emerald jade washed on Botafogo beach, like a sacredly cat, frightened and shy, yet ready to pounce. High cheeks and a curvy plumped devilish body of a Marilyn Monroe at fifteen. I still remember her as if I had seen her yesterday.
Her eyes were on me like mine on her, we spoke of nonsense and from that moment on we fell in an urgent and immediate hurricane of teen love. We spent every second of every moment of every sigh stolen from every hour borrowed from the week that would become the happiest days of our lives.
Hiding behind doors and street corners, kissing and holding each other at the brink of sin, crushing our fingers as we ran holding hands through the blue city in unstoppable excitement. Always wanting more, like young vampires, craving each other and discovering each other in words and looks and scents and we just knew that we belonged together and the world could have stopped turning, it did, and we didn't care.
After fife or seven days she finally left, her face like one big tear, holding purple flowers behind the tinted windows of a black Mercedes Benz.
I ran up to my hotel room where I remained locked up for three days, wondering why my heart looked like a broken vase, some pieces on the sidewalk of Maipu street, some at the lobby where we met, some had left with her.
My Mother somehow convinced the hotel manager that there was a water leak in my room, that is how the rivers I cried eventually reached Mar del Plata and that is how Buenos Aires became a part of me, that was when I had to let go of the most precious thing I have ever had.
I flew back to Brazil and she flew back to the States and to say that I've forgotten those emerald eyes would be a lie, this was 23 years ago.
(yes, we spoke on the phone a couple of days ago and it was the strangest deja vu feeling but at the same time it was just amazing)
Y es que empiezo a pensar
and I begin to think
que el amor verdadero es tan sólo el primero.
true love is just the first
Y es que empiezo a sospechar
and I begin to suspect
que los demás son sólo para olvidar
that the rest are just to forget.
Living in Brazil as a tourist required I leave the country every six and three months, not for very long, in about 48 hours I usually got my passport stamped and then I was welcome to enter the samba nation once more. This constant traveling allowed me to become more than familiar with Sao Paulo, Montevideo, Foz do Iguazu, Ciudad Stroessner and other South American cities. On this occasion my Mom and my step dad decided to join me at the Argentinian Capitol for a short vacation.
Buenos Aires is somber and very euro barroque, when compared to other cities of the Latin American cone it is glam and simply put is the classiest.
It's a beautiful and romantic town, the immense Rio de la Plata inlet and the old part of the City, particularly Barrio del Boca evokes Maradona, the Quilmes Soccer Squadra and the inevitable group of kids whistling tangos.
If you pay close attention you may spot Gardel's ghost, wandering around town on a Saturday night, hidden in an oxford grey cashmere coat. It was in this city of tangos, of romantic temper tantrums where I saw her for the first time: sitting on a couch at the lobby as I entered the hotel.
Blond like golden hay under the hard country sun on a hot summer day, green eyes like an emerald jade washed on Botafogo beach, like a sacredly cat, frightened and shy, yet ready to pounce. High cheeks and a curvy plumped devilish body of a Marilyn Monroe at fifteen. I still remember her as if I had seen her yesterday.
Her eyes were on me like mine on her, we spoke of nonsense and from that moment on we fell in an urgent and immediate hurricane of teen love. We spent every second of every moment of every sigh stolen from every hour borrowed from the week that would become the happiest days of our lives.
Hiding behind doors and street corners, kissing and holding each other at the brink of sin, crushing our fingers as we ran holding hands through the blue city in unstoppable excitement. Always wanting more, like young vampires, craving each other and discovering each other in words and looks and scents and we just knew that we belonged together and the world could have stopped turning, it did, and we didn't care.
After fife or seven days she finally left, her face like one big tear, holding purple flowers behind the tinted windows of a black Mercedes Benz.
I ran up to my hotel room where I remained locked up for three days, wondering why my heart looked like a broken vase, some pieces on the sidewalk of Maipu street, some at the lobby where we met, some had left with her.
My Mother somehow convinced the hotel manager that there was a water leak in my room, that is how the rivers I cried eventually reached Mar del Plata and that is how Buenos Aires became a part of me, that was when I had to let go of the most precious thing I have ever had.
I flew back to Brazil and she flew back to the States and to say that I've forgotten those emerald eyes would be a lie, this was 23 years ago.
(yes, we spoke on the phone a couple of days ago and it was the strangest deja vu feeling but at the same time it was just amazing)
Y es que empiezo a pensar
and I begin to think
que el amor verdadero es tan sólo el primero.
true love is just the first
Y es que empiezo a sospechar
and I begin to suspect
que los demás son sólo para olvidar
that the rest are just to forget.
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