My Dad's Divorce

I'm tired of sobriety

tired of suffering

tired of trying

I want to guide this ship to harbor

live the life I'd like to live.

Instead, like all of you,

I'm a prisoner of doing what's right,
wasting my life away.
Doing what's expected of me,
what other's expect of me.

Well, guess what?

Fuck the puppy

fuck the fish tank

fuck this worn out marriage

fuck the bank account

Cash out
raise the anchors

and sail the oceans
you're not the cancer that will kill me.

Red in Black

A King's Queen
a Viking's mare
that one thing I always wanted.
I feel attracted, with the gravitas of a failed parachute
like a UFO, pulling me up. 
I'm starstruck
dumbfounded, astonished
enchanted, ensnared, enamored,
simply put, I'm royally fucked.

She's a spell of glittering stars, floating on the lake
the scent of snow powder 
and as common as a unicorn.
As deadly as a Nordic siren
a Princess worth dying for.

My kingdom I surrendered effortlessly
since the first time I laid eyes on her
and I've yet to catch my breath

Emeralds in nuclear collision
fission, and streaks of blue cobalt fusion
could never match her eyes.
A dream inside a nightmare
a life worth living for
holy fuck
for such beauty, one could start a war
with anyone, for anything.

She's like discovering fire
like making music
like sleeping
like breathing oxygen.

And yet, she can't see me
I feel invisible
suffocating in her indifference
it's torture
it's pain
to her, I'm just like everybody else.

The Equilibrist

Dead,
and cold, and dry.
Hollow,
motionless, and grey,
sad.

Not just lonely,
but alone.
Whistling a happy tune in an empty mortuary,
carving a gravestone with my nails.
The bitter monotony brews into a sour poison,
as darkness blinds my sight,
folding my dreams in a tiny suitcase.

Like a drunk equilibrist
holding back tears,
suspended on the edge of my eyes.
Like a madman,
standing on the edge of a cliff.
Like an ugly vegetable at a grocery store,
like an empty garbage bag
like a fat beggar
like a communist with a lottery ticket
like a cripple with a bycicle
like a cancer patient in love
like a broken tv set
like a guitar with parkinson's disease
like a baby's coffin floating to a beach
like an open wound
like a deaf Beethoven
as I sit on a bench at this public park
chocking on my words
wishing I could just unzip myself in half
and let this love flow like sewage
down to the sea
that's how I feel when I look at you
knowing you'll never look at me.

Clandestine and Destiny

You can just tell yourself this is all fiction,
it's a fantasy you'll never fulfill.
If you dare open this door
your eyes must be ready to see the thoughts you repress
the things we're supposed to hide, stupidly
the recurring dreams when we meet...

When the night comes
my teeth become fangs
and my mouth begins to hurt
May I have this dance?

My hands ache, 
and I can see in the dark,
and under your dress
my hands caress your thighs.
My mouth salivates, 
and my mind spirals for a moment
as we hide, under the veil of the night.

I laugh behind my twisted smile
as my kisses undress your neck
and my hands play with your hair
disarming your defenses
... walls and monuments and dogmas
come crushing down on the floor,
with everything your mother told you
that day, at church.

It's your hungry mouth
and your skillful fingers
unzipping my jeans,
as I flat line in a temporary comma.
It's your sleepy eyes
your poisoned tongue around me
dictating every beat of my heart
every breath,
listening carefully to every unrehearsed word
every sound escaping my Alcatraz mouth.

It's your wedding band, blushing on my bedside table
it's your cellphone, purposely forgotten in the car
it's all the lights out
and the candlelight, outlining your perfect face
resting like shame, on my pillow.

And as you give yourself
and you begin to lose control
I asphyxiate between your thighs
impatiently, like a sailor adrift
like a thirsty drunk 
and I taste you, and I levitate in joy
and I die
and I resuscitate
and my tongue toys with you
as I drink you
as I guzzle you
in the scent of dry ambergris and labdanum
absinthe, laudanum
drowned in your cotton candy chloroform.

It's my firm hand, turning your hair into reins
it's my firm stroke
making you my mare
it's my blood, burning in your veins
it's my tongue, poisoning your throat 
as I sink my teeth on your shoulder
and we melt together
like two candles left lit 
left forgotten, 
burning in secrecy.

Water Lilies

I walk naked on the old boardwalk
feeling the board cracking under my weight
barefoot and undressed
dipping in the lukewarm bay.
Letting my body float on the sea
it feels so familiar, so safe
closing my eyes, letting go

Dreaming of the stars in your eyes
of the diamond dust on your skin
of your water lily footsteps
and your peaches of lips
of the light in your spirit
and the beacon in my horizon.